digital friendship request spam.

it doesn't matter what i do. what i write.... if my myspace is private or not, there will always, always be that one fucker who will randomly write me on myspace with some shit like "i dig art too, let's be friends <-----insert more digital diarrhea here** "... i'm pretty certain that the 5% of the population, that makes up these fantastic individuals, is really just one fucking person..., that is merely a shape shifting morph of what i would define as literally, my polar opposite, possessing every quality of what i would deem as very, very, unattractive.
i mean, i can say with a fair amount of confidence, that there is not a damn thing about my myspace that remotely suggests that if your profile picture holds the alluring charm of no shirt, tribal tattoos and dreadlocks, to please, please, write me with a shitty one line opener, followed by some uncreative way of asking for my digital friendship.
with that in mind, i'm wondering, what exactly is the method, if any at all, to this morphing madness? like, what's the process of selection, in which i wind up the lucky winner? i think these fuckers have some sort of, default, crap message, that just fucking spams inboxes around the nation, with the hopes of getting "a" response...., and that's what's really going here, i'm a victim, man, a victim. well, that's just not gonna stand. solution? i'm gonna create a counteraction, default, rejection message. yep. something that simply states:
"no need for the creation of uncreative spam email titled "yo". digital friendship shall never be obtained. please move on and morph into someone else's worse nightmare."
yeah, something along those lines.., simple, and to the point. however, unlike "random joe" with his spam crapshoot response tactic, i will have a more refined method of madness. oh yes sir.., see, i'm not gonna wait around till victimized again, i'm gonna find these shitty, shirtless dudes and spam them first. boom. rejection before action.
aaaand fuck it, i don't care if i take down some innocent bystanders in the spam rejection process, because i don't think there are any in this situation.. no innocents in the view i'm looking at.. for if you end up on my spam list, which shall be carefully and precisely narrowed down, by being cross referenced with all sorts of super shit like; long dreadlocks held in a high ponytail, tribal tattoos, an urge to show off those crap tattoos by not wearing a shirt, a strong like for noise pollution like, limp bizkit..., and anything else that would make me and most people, not want to even digitally converse with you.. you're fucked anyway. and if you haven't entertained the ridiculous notion that somehow we will be joined in digital friendship by stating that you "dig art too", i'm sure someday you will, therefore, you must be taken down.

interesting, yet pointless fact: it is 6:50 am right now, and no, i didn't just wake up. and yesss, of course i'm still drinking.